Unicorns and all that jazz

1) If internet dating ALWAYS use a full body picture in your profile. No filters, no face tune and no pictures with friends- especially if your friends are super hot! I learned this lesson the hard way many years ago. I posted a pic of my gorgeous friend and I on my dating profile, only to receive a barrage of messages asking if she was on the site too.  Nobody likes a catfish. Don't be that girl. 2) On a first date, always try to wow them with your personality. Go for either clever or funny - be knowledgeable about a shared passion or topic. Make him belly laugh!  If you don't feel up to either of those then I recommend a super low cut top. I personally go for making them laugh, backed up with a lot of boob showing (just in case I'm not as funny as I think I am) 3) My go to first date setting is always a bar located in a leisure centre. Have a drink, suss it out. If there is no spark or conversation then luckily the cinema is usually right next door. You don't hav...

As I am now  in my thirties, I can officially be classed as a cougar. These days we are constantly told that "age ain't nothing but a number" and that you can love whomever you want to as long as they are of a legal age. I have always gravitated towards older men myself but the stigma of an older woman dating a younger man is long gone and hot ladies (cougars, milfs) dating fit young men is pretty much seen as the norm. Now, I know as well as you do that I'm missing the "hot" part of being a cougar; and I've never been called a milf in my life! But I still had a crack at it! And as always it didn't quite work out for me....,., I was 29 talking to "K" who said he was 27. Ok, fair enough I thought. Get involved with some cougar action, why not? Things were going well, we arranged to meet. I was driving up to the designated meeting point and there is no way this boy is 27. He looked like his pictures sure enough and I get that some people...

As you all know by now, I am forever single. The living embodiment of the crazy cat lady. But some people, who don't know me well are unaware of this fact. It was at college on Friday when a classmate and I were chatting; she asked me in her thick Romanian accent, "You are married?" When I'd finished laughing hysterically at the question,  I answered "No. There's no man in my life". At which point she replied " Ah, you are a lesbian." Now there was no question mark at the end of that statement, it was said as fact and she nodded knowingly. Before I could respond, a chorus of questions and banter erupted around the room full of women. Telling me I was better off away from men blah, blah, blah. I let them carry on for a few minutes before I told them that actually no, I was all about the mans! I just couldn't get one. But what I noticed was the curiosity. Official statistics tell us that more than 50% of women in the UK are bi-curious and...

This blog is a little different in that it wasn't just a date but a relationship. A very short lived one! But a relationship none the less. J lived a few doors down from my friend, who I visited regularly. We had smiled at each other once or twice but that was it. Until one day my friend called me to say J had asked if I was single. I asked my friend to write him a note for me with my number on and post it through his door. Aww, a teenage romance I hear you say! Nope. I was 27. He called me that same day and although we had little in common, I thought he was ok and so it began.... After  a few days I realised we didn't have little in common, we actually had nothing in common. He bored me and I annoyed him; it was obvious from the start. He had an obsession with his car, not letting my kids in it in case it got dirty, washing it at least 3 times a week. We decided we wanted to go to winter wonderland at hyde park but as my kids weren't allowed in his car, we had to ask ...

This date actually happened a few years ago. I met T on POF.  His messages were sometimes written in very broken English so I asked him where he was from; he replied that he was from Hackney and just hated typing messages. Fair enough I thought. One evening I was child free. My friend... I'd best not use her real name... lets call her Smelen, arrived at my door, also child free. We were young, free and single so decided to go on a double date! T had been asking to see me so I messaged him asking if he was free? He was and so was his friend. We agreed to meet at the local leisure park and I asked for his phone number in case there was a problem or we were running late. It should have been my first red flag that he was SO hesitant to let me have it... So we were all tarted up and on our way to the Leisure park. I'd worn heels and was teetering about, top heavy with a throbbing bunion but I felt good! Until we missed the train because of my very slow teetering. I called him t...

I had a babysitter and I was doing it. I was going on a date. I'd met S on POF (plenty of fish dating site). He seemed nice, a hard worker, ok banter. I'd cancelled 5 dates we had arranged over the past 3 months and if I didn't want him to give up on me, that night had to happen. I was getting ready and I received a text - I'm too tired to drive. U come here. I'm not going to lie, I was annoyed. I'd wanted a glass of wine  but that was out the window now I had to drive. It bothered me he'd left it so late but I decided to be cool about it. I finished getting ready and off I went, dolled up anticipating a lovely meal out. Cruising optimistically to the picturesque town of Dunstable... I arrived and he walked over to my car. Wearing crappy jogging bottoms, sagging ridiculously low and a t-shirt with some very suspicious looking stains. There went my hopes for a nice meal. Instead he informed me we were going for a romantic walk. Around a rough council estat...